Once upon a time, there was a simple yet beautiful wooden cabin in the woods which sat in a sun-lit clearing among the wilderness. In the surrounding wilderness, rabbits sprung over twigs, butterflies flew with the soft breeze, and the crystal clear creek softly trickled in the background. Inside the cabin resided Sita, Rama, and Lakshama. The time was simple, but the love was strong. One sunny day, Rama's beautiful bride Sita glanced outside the window to see a beautiful, delicate deer that glinted in the light as if it was made of jewels. Sita was in awe and ran to her husband. She cried, "Rama, honey, would you mind catching that sweet deer I saw outside my window? It is exquisite and I must have it!" In a loving manner, Rama replied, "Of course, honey." However, Rama's brother Lakshama was very hesitant and suspicious of the light-footed and delicate animal they had seen. He urged Rama to be cautious, but Rama disregarded his concerns saying, "My wife deserves the very best, and I shall provide the very best." Rama instructed Lakshama to tend for his wife while he was gone and Lakshama promised to do so. A couple hours later when the afternoon turned to evening, Rama still hadn't returned. Sita was a bit more on edge and listened to every single thump in the forest as any of them may have been her husband returning with the sparkling deer. When she heard his voice from the forest crying for help, her stomach turned upside down and she felt queasy inside. She urged Lakshama to check on her husband and again, he was cautious and tried to focus Sita's attention on how strong and capable her husband was of defending himself. Needless to say, Lakshama ended up leaving the cabin to make sure Rama was not in peril and while Sita was alone, an elderly man wandered upon her cabin. Sita was very hospitable to the man and invited him inside and offered him the meat she had freshly cooked over the fire and offered him a glass of cool water from the stream. He graciously refused but began to talk about a powerful, handsome young man who would make her a goddess if she would come with him. Sita refused and felt increasingly insecure as this stranger was trying to take her away. The elderly man eventually gave off his true identity and Sita was shocked! The elderly man turned out to be Ravana and he scooped her up by the dirt under her feet (he cannot touch her against her consent or will perish on the spot due to an ancient curse) in hopes that she would eventually forget her husband and fall for him instead.
Author's Note: I chose this story because of the drama- epic displays of love and deceit all compacted into one story. I think there's several contrasting things- the beauty of the deer and the ugliness of the deceit exemplified by Ravana. Sita's loyalty to her husband is definitely highlighted and is to be commended. I added more detail to the story but did not want to take away from the qualities highlighted by the story so I didn't add any new events. I did, however, add my own dialogue.
Bibliography: Narayan, R. K. (1972) The Ramayana.
I love the detail you added. It drew me in and I wanted to read more. This is a beautiful story, and I'm glad you added your dialogue because it made the story more unique to you. I like that you focused on Sita in the story, instead of Rama and Lakshmama like Narayan does. I specifically like the description of Sita's hospitality to the old man.
ReplyDeleteYou did a good job of retelling this story. You didn't really stray away from Narayan's version too much, but you added enough detail to make this unique. Focusing on Sita was a really strong feature that was missing from Narayan's version and the way you described her and changed her dialogue really changed set your Sita apart because it made her come across as a very warm individual. Good Job.
ReplyDeleteThe detail in your story was really well done! I like that Sita seemed more of the princess that she kind of is, but it still had the dark foreboding "abduction" title. Overall it was really well done and I wish I could have read more in this story. The one thing I didn’t like was the parenthetical where you explain how Ravana couldn’t physically touch her. That was awkward and definitely should have been incorporated into the story better. It was a tonal shift.
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